Mystery

There’s something happening in spite of myself. From here it feels like an inversion; the exact opposite of everything I know and do. I do not know anything. I see what I’ve been doing; and I want to tell the child to stop, that project is done, you don’t have to do that anymore. Is it normal for this to feel like failure?

Would it make sense to say that spiritual opening feels like going into failure, living/dying into it & being blown away that that’s not all. You stay, and something starts to happen. You feel stupid, you stay, you feel humble, you stay, you see your silliness (wounded, sheepish), you stay, humiliated, you stay. You don’t want everyone to see all this.

But you will, they will.

And the world shifts, as you ‘do’ nothing. Stupid and beautiful. Wounds and gifts. Silenced parts are the most valued, healing energy. How can you not be curious when you are inverted. It helps with the stupidity that pervades this part..